shortcrust pastry

Like Swiss army knives and mobile phones, shortcrust pastry can be used for loads of different things.
You can use this recipe for every kind of pie or tart you can imagine, from jam tarts and mince pies to pork pies and apple cake.
The wains love cutting out shapes, dropping on a blob of jam and baking them.

250g pack of butter.
400g plain flour
100ml cold water

My mother-in-law uses twice as much flour (by weight) as butter, but I find it works better if I use a bit less.

Rub the butter into the flour until it’s all crumbly. If you want to top a rhubarb crumble or something, this is the stuff to use.
If you’re going the whole hog and making the pastry, add your 100ml of water, the colder the better, and use it to bind the crumbs into a solid lump.
Put it in a sandwich bag or cling film and when you smooth it out it should look sort of marbly.
Leave it for half an hour to rest before rolling and cutting it.

Fill it and bake it. How long you bake it for depends on what’s in it, but about 200ºC for 20 mins should do it.

You can freeze it if you don’t use it all.
If you find a good use for shortcrust pastry, add a comment.

Bread

Tonight on Dave:
6pm Dragons' Den
7pm Ray Mears - Extreme Survival
8pm Top Gear
9pm QI

and during the breaks, we're going to make a loaf of bread.

In the break before Dragons' Den, gather up the following ingredients and stick them in a big bowl.
450g strong white flour
300ml warm water
1 teaspoon of yeast,
1 teaspoon of salt,

Mix the ingredients up until they stick together and cover them with a tea towel (probably best if it's clean)
also, get a bottle of oil out. We'll need it later.

Settle down and watch the first part of Dragons' Den.

During every commercial break in the Dragons' Den, pour oil over your hands, knead the dough during one ad, and then put it back in the bowl and cover it up.

At the end of Dragons' Den/Start of Ray Mears, just lie there and watch TV. You can lie through the first ad break too, though you might want to get up and get a drink from the fridge.

During the second break in Ray Mears, roll up your dough into a tight ciabatta-sized roll and set it on a floured tray, covered with your tea towel.

When Top Gear is starting, turn on your oven to get it pre heated. Turn it on as hot as it'll go - usually about 220°C .

During the first commercial break in Top Gear, cut a slash in the top of your loaf and put it in the hot oven.

Check it during every break in Top Gear to make sure it doesn't get burnt, but if all goes well it'll be ready before QI starts at 9pm.